Followers

12/24/2018

Merry Christmas

Good afternoon, and I hope everyone is caught up on their Christmas prep. Sorry to have been MIA for a while, and since there is a rare quiet moment, I'd like to wish all my blog followers a Very Merry Christmas. For those who have sent Christmas cards, Get Well Cards, and emails of encouragment, I want to say a heartfelt thank you.


For those of my followers who don't know why I have been away from Blogland and will continue to be away for a time, I will try to update you.

The October scan that DH had, showed a 4cm mass in the upper left quadrant of his intestine...Very likely malignant.We found to our distress, a colonoscopy nor an Endoscopy, show that area. (or so we've been told!) He was faithful in getting the tests we were told responsible people should have. He had surgery to remove that mass on Nov 7, and it was discovered he had other places in his intestines, plus the problem has metastized to both lungs. A 4-5 day surgical stay ended up being 14 days, of sheer misery.

A hospital oncologist saw him and was very brutal in delivering the news that if he does nothing, probable life expectancy of a couple months. With chemo, he  might gain a few additional months. But the condition is terminal, and he didn't mince words in saying so. Very difficult to hear this. This was shortly after the Nov 7 surgery. He was released on Nov 21, home for 4 days, began vomiting uncontrollably, so we had to rush him back to the hospital, as he had dehydrated. We think a lot of that was because the intravenous nutrition food he was being provided once home, was the wrong stuff (not what was given in hospital, and I DID question the difference in what I saw. Additionally he was on a clear liquid diet per his surgeon, and we had been told he could have 'shakes' made with whey powder, almond milk, baby food fruit - to build him up for chemo. Also WRONG!). So next time home, he was on the clear TPN (the liquid nutrition) & only clear liquid diet and that has seemed to work better. Additionally, we asked for anti-nausea meds, which (fingers x'd) so far have kept the vomiting away.

It's been a hellish several weeks, as I know nothing about how to take care of someone in this condition, and I'm having to inject vitamins, insulin into this prepared TPN, flush iv lines, connect & disconnect to a pump that feeds this stuff, and empty a belly drain bag too. My brain is in such a state, I didn't retain info, and most of the time, felt as though I'd break into 10 million tiny pieces from sheer nervous upset. I've pretty much learned how to do the TPN, still get scared doing it, afraid I'll do something wrong. But we are trying to take it day by day...and praying constantly

He is scheduled to get a chemo port on 12/27, and try to start chemo on 1-2. DH has a very low threshold for nausea, and I worry that he won't be able to tolerate it. Additionally, we've used up a lot of the 'couple months do nothing' scenario so not sure if the time that may be gained, if the tumors can be shrunk, will be worth the side effects of the chemo.

So for all of you who have sent up prayers on his and our behalf..PLEASE keep them going upward. We've prayed for a miracle...but also pray for courage to face whatever comes. I didn't have the time (nor the motivation) to send out any cards, but have been uplifted by all the lovely cards we've been sent. And the emails so many of you have sent, to say you're thinking of us. It means more than you will ever know, unless you have to face a situation like this. I know so many others have done so, and probably with a lot more grace than we are able to put into the journey.

I hope I can return to Blogland in the future, but right now, my biggest priority is looking after #1 DH. He's very precious to me, and I'm trying my best to do all I can to help him through this journey, keep him comfortable, and let him know just how much he is loved.

Again, thanks to all of you, and I wish each of you a Merry Christmas. Our daughter & SIL arrived this morning for a few days, so at least we can spend Christmas once more as a family.

God Bless.

35 comments:

  1. My dear Mary, I am so very sorry to read all of this, what a time you and your DH have had. I do not know who is suffering most with all this but I do know that I hope that the chemo works and God gives you both, the strength to get through all of this.
    I hope that you can have the best Christmas possible while under all this stress and I am sure that having your Daughter for a few days will be a great help and a touch of joy at this time.
    My very best wishes to you and your Hubby, I have missed you and I do hope that you will return when you are ready and able to.

    Thinking of you both.

    Kath xxxx

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  2. Dear Mary, Ive just read your post and so very sorry to learn about the terrible and frightening time you are both going through. I will certainly be keeping you in my thoughts. With my love and sending big hugs. xxx

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  3. I am so sorry to hear your devastating news Mary and you don't sound weak at all just a caring and loving human being.I read this after just replying to your email sorry it's been a few days but even though I don't "know" you personally I feel for your situation and pray you have the strength to get through ----so sorry
    Carol x

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  4. I also meant to add I was very concerned about you finding out that a colonoscopy and an endoscopy don't show up the results in that area as you know my hubby was having the same tests too so also given me some serious doubts!!!
    Carol x

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  5. Will pray for you and DH. So sorry to hear, but you know who the great physician is? HE is better then any doctor and will help you do what needs to be done. Jesus has more compassion for you and DH, He knows what you are going through, you are not alone in all this. You are being a very good caregiver to your husband blessings to you and DH.

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  6. Merry Christmas Mary! Thank you for taking the time to post an update. Dealing with medical issues is very stressful and I'm so sorry the doctor was brutal when delivering the news. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers.
    Hugs from Oklahoma. ~Andrea

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  7. I know it's been such a rough road you've been traveling, but just know that I care, and I hope and pray Joe finds peace through all of his battles. I think if all of us were thrust into a situation like yours, we'd be falling to bits too, so you're doing the best you can and that's all any human being can do. In spite of all this, I hope you and Joe can find peaceful moments of joy during the Christmas season, and I hope you find comfort in knowing how much I care. Sending prayers for a good Christmas and hugs for whenever you need them :)

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  8. Mary, I am so sorry to hear your husband's diagnosis and feel for your role as nurse, carer and wife. I'm sure you are doing a great job. Make sure you bug his physicians even with the most trivial questions. that's what they are there for. Many Hugs Christine

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  9. OH Mary, how awful for you both. You must still be in shock, I think you are doing amazing under the circumstances. Sending much love and prayers xxx

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  10. Praying for you Mary x

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  11. No doctor knows when the end is, only God determines when he will take a person, so you hold on to faith Mama Mary because God does give miracles. My prayers, love and thoughts are always with you and hubby I have been through this myself, you are going through much more than I ever had to though. So there is no thing weak about you - you are being very strong and caring for your love, letting him know how much you love him. Trust me, they know with the care you are giving how much they are loved! So hang in there, prayers are definitely going up all the time and know that you BOTH are very loved!!!! Try to enjoy the Christmas holidays as best as you can as a family. I know DD will cheer up hubby. Love and hugs, Brenda

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  12. Christ's blessings of peace on all of you. May you feel his presence.

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  13. God Bless you both Mary and I wish that prayers give you both the strength to get through this worrying time. Having your daughter and SiL there with you will I'm sure help you at this holiday.
    Faith
    x

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  14. Aching heart here for the both of you. Mary, I sent you an email. love, de

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  15. Oh Mary, I am so very sorry to hear this news. I can only imagine the suffering both of you are going through. I will be praying for you both. The Lord does amazing things. Know you are not alone. I am happy your daughter and son-in-law are with you for Christmas. Please know you and DH are in my thoughts and prayers
    Loving hugs,
    Pam

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  16. My heart goes out to all you both are going through but I know whatever is ahead that the Lord will help you through it. You are both in my prayers and thoughts and I hope you have a great Christmas with the family. Make a memory that will last forever. Sending hugs too.

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  17. Oh Mary I am just hearing about your dh. I'm sending prayers your way for both of you.

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  18. It was very thoughtful and sweet of you to take the time to post this update for all your readers and friends who haven't heard, Mary. I'm sure it is much appreciated and it never hurts to spread the word so even more prayers can be sent heavenward on behalf of you and Joe. This has all been very devastating for all of us who have come to love you. You may not feel like it, but you have been an inspiration. Your honesty and love and faith will help you face what lies ahead, plus knowing that so many of us have you wrapped tightly in cyber hugs to give you strength and courage. Lots of love to you both, Darnell

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  19. Dear Mary (and Joe), I think of you both every single day - I think you are handling all of this remarkably well and your love for Joe really does shine through and must help him enormously. I know it is difficult for both of you and I hope having family around at Christmas will be a little lift for you both. Please take care of yourself too Mary - our Christmas is nearly over but I hope you are able to enjoy today as best you can. Lots of love and big hugs, Anne xxx

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  20. (((Mary & Joe))) I am sorry you have had this news. I'm sending heaps of positive healing thoughts and huge hugs. I'm sure your love for each other will allow both of you to help the other when needed and to walk the path ahead with strength. Lots of Love Sue

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  21. I'm so sorry to hear your devastating news, my heart goes out to you both, you are in my thoughts.
    Pauline
    x

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  22. Thank you for the update and you are both in my prayers and thoughts. Prayers are coming your way constantly from everyone and you are so strong to share this. I hope the chemo is tolerated and helps shrink the tumors. God can perform miracles and we are all hoping for that on your behalf. Love and hugs.

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  23. Dearest Mary, thank you so much for finding the time to post this for your Followers. Such a very difficult time for you both, and your Daughter, i am sure though that you are doing well in your nursing care and finding the strength to do so.
    Keeping you both in my thought and heart that you will find the courage needed to sustain you during this trying time, bless you both, hugs Kate x

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  24. Oh Mary, I am so, so sorry for what you and your DH are enduring. You are in my thoughts and I will keep you both in my daily prayers. I can't imagine what you are going through, but I have complete faith that God will see you through. Sending huge hugs and many prayers your way, Mary.

    Lisa
    A Mermaid's Crafts

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  25. I'm sorry to hear your news Mary and am sending positive prayers for you and your DH.
    Kath x

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  26. So sorry to hear your sad news....just broke my heart. Sending lots of love and prayers your way!

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  27. Dearest Mary my heart goes out to you. You are doing your best under enormous strain x. I shall send positive thoughts and prayers and keep you in my thoughts. Hugs x

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  28. Oh Mary - you will cope - I never thought I would, but I did with God's grace, and will pray that you will too -
    Praying for strength, comfort and Peace that passes understanding for you both
    Maxine

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  29. Mary, I am so sorry to hear this. I always pray for my friends and will pray for you and Joe even more now. Peace be with you.

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  30. Oh Mary I am so, so sorry to read your news. You need to stay strong for hubby and know that we are all thinking of you both!

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  31. My dear Mary. I am so sorry to read this dreadful news. I am sending you both my love and wish you both strength and courage xx

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  32. Lifting you both up in my prayers.

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  33. Stay strong Mary!
    I have missed you!
    Please know that we are thinking about you and your DH!

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  34. Constantly thinking of you both in this battle. Sending big hugs to envelop you both. Mrs A.

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  35. Oh man.....I am so sorry to be reading this and to hear what you are going through never mind your DH. If I hear of anything that may be of help, I will let you know here on how to help him. Can he drink Ensure? It is milky and has sugar in it but it is of5en given to people who are trying to keeps their strength up. My prayers and thoughts are with you.

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