Followers

3/05/2014

Summary of Life

This came into my email this morning. Thought it would make a good post. Hope you smile as you read this...I did.

Mr. Irish Cherokee always starts his posts with a thought provoking or insightful bit of writing before he shares a card. When I read the below bits, I decided this is my insightful & though provoking ponder for the day. Sorry for the green background. It came into my email like this, and I don't know how to change the background color when I pasted into a post. Tried things I know to do, didn't work. Please enjoy it anyway. My smile to you. I hope. :-)

Intend to get back later to post a card. And also to try to catch up with all you lovely readers who have left comments for me. Later gator. Hugs too.
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Summary of Life

 
GREAT TRUTHS THAT CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED:

1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
2) When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair.
3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato.
5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair.
7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time.
8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
9) Don't wear pok-a-dot underwear under white shorts.
10) The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap.

 

GREAT TRUTHS THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED:

1) Raising teenagers is like nailing jelly to a tree.
2) Wrinkles don't hurt.
3) Families are like fudge...mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
5) Laughing is good exercise.. It's like jogging on the inside.
6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.

 

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD :

1) Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there.
4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody asks you the questions.
6) Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone.

 

THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE:

1) You believe in Santa Claus.
2) You don't believe in Santa Claus.
3) You are Santa Claus.
4) You look like Santa Claus.

SUCCESS:

At age 4 success is . . . . Not piddling in your pants.
At age 12 success is . . . Having friends.
At age 17 success is. . Having a driver's license.
At age 35 success is. .. . Having money.
At age 50 success is . . . Having money.
At age 70 success is . . . Having a driver's license.
At age 75 success is . .... Having friends.
At age 80 success is . . . Not piddling in your pants.

Pass this on to someone who could use a laugh.

Always remember to forget the troubles that pass your way;
BUT NEVER
forget the blessings that come each day.

Have a wonderful day with many! *smiles*
Take the time to live!!!
Life is short.
Dance naked (but not while frying bacon!) Woo-hoo!

Oh yaaa

23 comments:

jimlynn said...

Cute!

Rita said...

Hilarious Mary, but oh so true. X. Hugs Rita xxx

Benzi said...

I like the four stages of life.....I think. Ha

Mrs A. said...

Defo not when frying anything!! Thanks for the laugh. Hugs Mrs A.

Lisa said...

These are so awesome!! They definitely made me smile!! Thanks for sharing!! Have a great day :)

Lisa
A Mermaid's Crafts

Patricia said...

Loved it all, so true and I have enjoyed a good laugh.
Thank you for sharing
Hugs

Patricia xx

Hazel said...

Brilliant Mary thank you for the laugh. Hazel xx

Sheila H said...

Thanks for the laughs, Mary :)

Redanne said...

Thank you Mary, that is absolutely brilliant! And sadly true for this old girl..... Hugs, Anne x

Di said...

Made me laugh!

Hugs
Di
xx

Princess Judy Palmer said...

Oooh... yeah, I mean no to the dancing naked while frying bacon thing. Truisms, all of these.

Jenny L said...

Hi Mary,
I have heard a lot of these before, but some I haven't. They are fab especially the live every day to the full.
Not so sure about the dancing naked, as all the wobbly bits just wobble.
Love to laugh and smile each and every day, especially at myself.lol.
Lots of crafty love. Jenny L.

Pat said...

So true and so funny Mary. x

Irish Cherokee said...

I needed this today Mary. Its been a rough one. I didn't "piddle" but I did giggle a bit. Thanks.

Darnell J Knauss said...

Yay! Thank you for publishing this clever post that I wrote! Well, okay, I didn't write anything other than the "Life is Short" part, but I sure do agree with all of these clever witticisms!! I especially liked the one about the rocking chair/roller coaster and the one about how we have all the answers, but no one asks us!!

I stopped on this post tonight, but I've had a great visit to your other posts! I am once again so far behind that I can see my own butt!! I'll try to do better!! You have so much energy with all your posts and with your cards that obviously take quite a bit of time (as opposed to mine, lol!) and care to make that it's hard to keep up with you, girl!! Hugs, Darnell

Jill Norwood said...

I missed this post on Irish's blog but I sure needed to read it! Thanks for sharing it!! :)

Brenda said...

Oh my gosh, how fun it was to read this and how sad it was to learn I'm older than I should be. lol I was fun and full of laughs and yep, I almost piddled my pants! lol Hugs!

Karen Petitt said...

FAB!!! Love all of these, really made me laugh lol! xx

Joni nina Andaya said...

Aww...Mary, This is Fantastic! Thank you for making me laugh....you are Awesome, I needed that :)

Bonnie said...

This has certainly left me chuckling! Excuse me, jogging on the inside! Love it!

Petra Swart said...

Oh, this has given my a nice laugh, Mary!! (won't tell you in which stage of life I am!!!!) You have given me a lovely start to my day!!! TFS!!
Hugz

Faith A said...

Well you certainly had me laughing, some I have seen before, but they still get me laughing, thanks for the laugh.

Natasha said...

hahaha love this post :)
Hi hunni, thanks so much for your visit to my page and for your lovely comment, its very much appreciated. I've returned the friendship and become a follower here and on pinterest, I've had a bit of a nosy through some of your posts and look forward to seeing many more of your beautiful creations.
Love and hugs
Natasha xnx